My View on Vaccines

Both of my girls are current on vaccines. Halie got her first shot minutes after she was born, and Katelynn, about 4 months after she was born. Why did I wait the second time around? There is just so so so much controversy over the whole vaccine ordeal that I wasn't really aware of until I became pregnant with Katelynn, that I kept flip flopping on my decision to get her the shots I feared, or not.

I did a lot of research supporting both sides, and decided I needed to make a decision and stick to it. Should I take the risk of my child becoming infected with meningitis or whooping cough at a young age where in that case, one of those diseases could be potentially deadly if I chose not to vaccinate? Or should I vaccinate knowing that there is a small percent of a reaction and possible injury or death occurring from those shots? Those are two heavy things to think about. Especially when it involves your children.

After going back and forth with my fears and concerns, I knew that the right thing was to get the shots done because ultimately, the benefits of those shots outweigh the risks tenfold. Considering how people died from these terrible diseases (polio, pertussis, tetanus, hep b etc) not even a hundred years ago, and now...there have hardly been any cases of those diseases in America since vaccines became available to protect against them.

It took me awhile to figure things out, but I got it right, and now I can rest easy knowing I did the right thing for my children in making the choice to get them vaccinated. They are both happy, healthy girls and I don't regret my decision at all to vaccinate.

Trying New Things

I've discovered in having my second child, that it can be quite the hindrance at times when it comes to bed times, dinner and one-on-one time with my hubby and 3 year old. Don't get me wrong, I love Katelynn so much and wouldn't do anything to change things, but I just feel like I get nowhere sometimes because she requires so much extra of me. That sounds so bad, I know, but it's not like that at all. I guess I can't describe how I truly feel without sounding like a terrible, unappreciative mother. Halie was my easy baby, and I always find myself comparing Katelynn to her, and going back to the same parenting techniques I used before. I have to constantly remind myself that Katelynn is not Baby Halie so therefore, needs to be brought up differently to suite hers and our needs. She's not a bad baby, she's just different and has a bit more of a 'kick' to her. She keeps me on my toes and then some.

Bedtime, I dread putting little Katelynn down for the night because it usually doesn't happen how I want. Every time I nurse and comfort her to sleep, creep slowly to her crib and ever so gently set her down, she awakes, frantic and screaming for me to pick her up again. Aye! This goes on for typically 2 hours or so until I'm so frustrated and drained I just let her scream and I go in my room and stick a pillow over top my head. She'll scream (bless her) for HOURS sometimes.

Last night, I decided something had to change. My whole family is stressed out because of her little cry-fests, so we decided to set her a bedtime, and make a routine that we can stick to for every night of the week until she is able to fall asleep without mommy right there for hours. I was thinking, Halie goes to bed around 8ish so I would start putting Katelynn down around 7 so I could have some time with Halie before she hit the hay. Sounds good, right? Here we go!

Tonight, I gave Katelynn her dinner, we walked around outside and watched Halie ride her bike until about 6:30. Then we went in for a bath while Halie stayed out with Daddy and splashed around in there for about 15 minutes. I dried her little baby bod off, rubbed her down with lotion and put her p.j.'s on. Then we nursed and I sang Twinkle Twinkle Little Star thinking that if I started singing that song every night, she would soon start to realize that we were close to bedtime and it would be easier for her to get to bed once I set her down in her crib...awake. She decided she was done nursing after about 5 minutes, so I gave her a kiss and a cuddle, set her in her crib and told her 'night night, I love you' before walking out of the room. Feeling confident about the night, I decided to go outside and have some one-on-one time with God. It was great. I got to enjoy his presence undisturbed and tell Him all about the night and how much I needed his support and love through this whole routine thing. Although Katelynn cried for a good 45 minutes, I feel things will improve if I press on with what I started (something I'm terrible at).

Solids, Sitting up and Shawmut House

Katelynn is sitting up now! It goes by so much faster the second time...watching your child grow that is. Both my girls started sitting up around five months and it's such a proud feeling watching your children grow and reach all of their milestones accordingly. Crawling will be soon to follow I'm sure. Just seeing how happy my little baby gets when she looks up at me after I've set her down on the floor to sit, makes my heart melt. They're so precious.

Halie was never big on solids until around 9-10 months old it seems. Katelynn on the other hand has been snaring at whatever we're eating since she was about four months, so I started her on solids. The first few weeks, it was just a little bit of really runny cereal, but she gobbled it down. Today, we started sweet potatoes and she loves those. We're taking it slow, but if it were up to her, she'd be eating steak and potatoes I'm sure. Still nursing too. About every 3 hours. She's at the day care now, so I go nurse her when they call to say she's hungry and that way, I don't have to pump because MAN! Pumping is a pain when you're working practically full-time and still trying to maintain a household and be a good mommy and wife in your spare time.

Our house is really coming along. My hubby is pulling in a lot of extra side jobs right now so we're able to afford things we weren't planning on buying till next summer. It's great. I'm in a great spot right now. I love where we live, I have a few great friends that I've become close to, I'm discovering more about myself and my relationship with God and things are just really coming together for my family. I'm so blessed. My marriage has improved greatly since we've had less stress in our lives and are finally getting the ball rolling with our house.

Baby Fuzzies

While I'm not working my one or two days at the coffee shop, I'm loving up babies. It's great. You should try it sometime. There's nothing better than smelling and nuzzling a warm little baby body. It's like aromatherapy...smelling a baby, that is. It's just so comforting and makes you feel all warm and fuzzy inside.

I was working at Snowy Mountain today and was having Russell withdrawals because I hadn't seen him in two days and I was starting to feel the effects. You see, Russ is my friend Amy's baby and I get the privilege of watching him while she works. He is so sweet and laid back. I could just eat him up. Anyhoo, she brought baby Russ to have lunch at the shop today and it's funny how he affected me just like my own little Katelynn does. I guess I'll let you figure that one out...but it has something to do with lactating...thought you might like to know because you read my blog and if you read my blog...you must be interested in all the little details of my life, right? Good.

I go to Amy's and watch baby Russ, and I get to bring my own sweet girls along. We have fun. Halie is my diaper tosser. She enjoys that job so I let her toss dirty diapers and bring me blankets and pacifiers. She loves helping and I love that she enjoys helping mommy, even if it's just doing little things for me here and there.

Next week, I get two more kiddos! Baby Landon and Halie's friend Kieryn. That should be interesting. I'll try it on and if I can handle five kids then we'll continue on through the summer. So that makes three little babies, and two toddling girlies. I'm thrilled!!!

This is...

Snowy Mountain Coffee in Harlowton, Montana. I started working here part-time about two weeks ago and I absolutely love it! They roast their own coffee and have the BEST chai and blended lattes I've ever had. MUCH better than Starbucks.

I never thought making espresso and Gyros could be so satisfying...but it just is. Maybe it's the fact that I get a break from the kids twice a week. Or maybe it's the fact that I get to drink the best darn lattes that I get the satisfaction of making for myself. I do have to say that I love working with one of my bestest girlies Melody too. We have too much fun, us two!

What's funny is, how many variations of the same drink you can make and how very important it is to get the right consistency for the foam you put into folks drinks. I'm learning a lot about being a Barista but it's all fun and smiles...with the occasional grumpy customer that comes in.

The only thing I'm really scared of is that vug under the rug (just kidding...line out of Dr. Suess' There's a Wocket in my Pocket). No but really, there's one of those commercial grade meat-slicers and it just gives me the heeby jeebies because one time I saw a girl take a nice chunk out of her finger at a deli. Not so cool. Melody is helping me get over my fear though. Wanna know how? Ok, I'll tell ya. She pretty much says if I don't do it...she'll beat me...and I don't want a beatin' from Melody. I've seen the way she man-handles John and I just don't want to go there with her. Yeah, that was a lie. But I fear the Melodious beating anyway.

Promise me you'll never ever buy this stuff. I did, and I'm in big trouble. The good news? I'm getting a Stair Master tomorrow. Bad news? I can't change the fact that I bought this sinfully delicious ice-cream that I will forever carry around on my thighs. It was love at first bite.

Postpartum Cravings

I didn't really have any major cravings while pregnant. It was nice because I was able to maintain a good weight for my already overweight frame.

Lets make a quick comparison: 1st baby I gained about 60 pounds
2cnd baby I only gained 30 pounds.

Good, right? I think so.

So here I am, battling these cravings that I have decided to link to being a postpartum mommy. Not sure if me being able to eat two dozen peanut butter cookies is related to that or not...or if scarfing down three scoops of ice-cream in one sitting is either...but that's my story and I'm stickin' to it! Got it? Good!

You see, during my pregnancy, I actually didn't eat all that much. Ok, ok...sometimes I did. But towards the end I couldn't hardly stomach eating dinner with my family or swallowing a bite of ground beef or frog legs or calf fritters or a good ol' booger. Sweets was another thing nixed out of the pregnancy diet completely. I didn't have a sweet tooth whatsoever, so why now? Why now when I want to lose weight do my doorknob hormones decide to put me through such agony? I can't resist my urges to eat such divine desserts and I can feel the Crisco, cream and sugar filling my soul (and my butt).
She thinks it's hilarious...it's all her fault...she's evil...and cute...and GOSH I love her...the end.

Katelynn Miranda

December 18th, 2007 is a night I won't forget. It was 11 p.m. and I was sound asleep when suddenly awakened by some of the most memorable pain I will ever experience in all my life. 'This must be contractions' I thought. I tried closing my eyes again thinking I was probably wrong...but then BOOM! Another one hit...hard. I got up, walked around and decided to start timing them. 8 minutes apart. Yup, this was the real thing. My midwife said to call when I was having contractions 8 minutes apart that I couldn't walk or talk through. So I called in and she told me to hang for a little while longer until they were five minutes apart...unless my water broke. So guess what? A little while later I went to the bathroom and low and behold...my water broke. Woke hubby up, got Halie ready to go to the neighbor's and bolted down to Billings. MAN! That was the longest drive of my life. What took an hour felt like ten hours as my contractions were NOT like I had imagined. Ha, I thought they would be like the braxton hicks I was experiencing but stronger. Boy was I wrong! I got to the hospital and then everything was kind of a blur, besides the pain that blindsided me every five minutes now. I finally broke and asked for an epidural. The best thing at the time, but later something I would regret getting as I got a terrible spinal headache after they removed it. So now I have this epidural...and life is good. I fall asleep, and then start waking up as I feel as if something is coming out of me. I call for the nurse and she checks me. "You're fully dilated! And that baby is coming!" So in comes the midwife, and it's time to start pushing. Fifteen minutes or so, I am holding my new baby girl in my arms and am totally amazed at how different an experience this is compared to my cesarean with Halie. 7 pounds, 2 oz...19 1/4 inches long...and totally PERFECT. She was born at 10:26 a.m. on the 19th of December. Praise the Lord! I'm done! All that time that seemed to pass so slowly was all in the past now and it was time to start another chapter of my life with two kids (three if you count my husband ha ha) and return to normalcy. Might I mention how helpful my husband has been in helping with Halie as I adjust to being a new mommy again. Life is good.

Hurry Up Baby!

Okay...second pregnancy...39 weeks...tired of this! Don't they say that you always go early after you've been pregnant once? I'm waiting. Had my membranes stripped today and I'm sure nothing will happen because that would be my luck. It was a short trip down to Billings though because I'd done my shopping the week before so all I had was an exchange at Old Navy, a quick Target run and my doctors appointment. Okay so we had Taco Bell too :) I was home at 3:30 which is unusual as my Billings run always takes me about 8-9 hours for some odd reason. So now it's time to say goodnight! If you have any heart at all...you'll pray this babe pops out of me tonight!

It's a windy windy day here in Shawmut, Montana. That's one thing that I absolutely hate about this area. Halie can't even fall asleep because it's howling so bad.

I am finally full-term meaning I could have this baby at any given moment...and MAN am I ready. Every night I think I'm in labor practically as my braxton hick contractions are becoming so strong and close together...but then they stop...darn it. I am guessing this will be my last post for awhile as I just don't have much to write about now. Me at 38 weeks, 3 days...full-term! Man, she could be a model! :)

Tiny Tid-bits

Haven't been on for awhile. I guess when all is said and done, life happens so quickly, that I can hardly find time to check my e-mail lately.

Baby has been sucking the life out of me from the inside out for 36 weeks now (thanks Melody) and I'm just about sick of feeling like a fat whale with a broken back. Went to the doctor yesterday and it looks like my body is getting ready to have this little bugger that I so anxiously await to hold in my arms.

Halie is still clueless as to what is going on. In the meantime, she's having fun not having to share mommy, reading books, kissing doggy noses and singing Kwinkle Kwinkle Widdle Staw while dancing to her own tune. She could care less if mommy says she's having a baby. The funny thing about two year olds is that they are only focused on the reality of now. Something I as an adult have a hard time focusing on, my two year old deals better with.

Old Hallow's Eve

It was Halie's first year trick-or-treating and my first year trick-or-treating for someone other than myself. Actually, I haven't been a part of that kind of thing since about 8th grade. I was thinking I might try and dress up with my girl this year but didn't have the energy or brains to come up with anything but a "fat cow" outfit...because that is what I feel like being 8 months pregnant.

The past three Halloween's, my mom has sent along Halie's costumes. The first year she was a pink kitty, then a monkey, and this year, a little ladybug. Very cute. The only problem was she wasn't being very camera cooperative with me so I only got about two pictures of her in her costume.After trick-or-treating all of downtown Harlowton (about 6-7 businesses in total that were open) we drove up to the nursing home and collected candy from a few residents who were more than pleased to see a cute little two year old in a red and black ladybug outfit. Halie was a little frightened by a few of the folks as she couldn't understand why they had oxygen tubes going up their noses...so we left. THEN (there should've never been a next stop as we had had enough stimulation for the day) we drove to one of the church's in town where everyone and their brother was eating hot dogs, playing silly games to win candy and shooting the...you know. First of all, Halie doesn't understand the meaning of wait in line and second I was overheating and getting claustrophobic. We weren't there for even an hour when Halie started having severe mental breakdown attacks and I had to drag her to the car (literally) where she proceeded to beg and scream for candy after she embarrassed me in front of everyone. We should've stopped with the nursing home. I know for future reference now not to over-stimulate a two year old!

We slept really good that night...the end.

License Renewal

I got my license renewed today and MAN it took forever. I was thinking since I live in such a small community, I would just waltz in and right back out again after filling out a piece of paper and smiling for the camera. Nope! I was there for about two hours! It seemed as if every old person was there having to take a driving test too (there was only one person to help you) so it was a long drawn out waiting process...with a two year old that doesn't understand the meaning of patience.

Now it's done...my picture is so up close and personal that you could probably see a booger if you looked closely. The last one you could at least see my shoulders...quite comical this one is actually. Oh well. I don't have to go back for another eight years! Halie will be TEN! WOW! :)

Halie is done with snack. Pizza dough is rising in the oven and floors still need their daily sweeping. Here is a picture of Halie and I on our front porch from yesterday morning!

My News

As you know, I had to have an ultra-sound to rule out any potential problems in my pregnancy as I was measuring big. Everything was fine just like I thought it would be, and we found out what we're having. We're having a boy! The ultra-sound tech said that they're wrong sometimes but she was pretty sure. I guess I don't feel so bad about getting rid of my baby clothes from Halie now :) Now hubby and I just have to come to a conclusion with names! That'll be tough because it was with Halie and I'm sure Ryan will be even more picky with a boy.

Today I am in my third trimester. Hooray for the home-run stretch! I'm so happy to be almost there because I'm really starting to get sick of being pregnant. At least the hot summer is over. That was no fun at all.

I wish I would've brought my camera with me when the family took a walk today. It is a beautiful day here in Shawmut. Hardly any wind, sun is shining and the temperature was just perfect. We walked a few properties over to a place I'd never been and the neighbors have some horses that were very happy to see humans...and Halie was happy to pet their noses. Next time I will have to bring the cam to capture Halie's excitement.

We're having beef stew for dinner and I'm getting hungry so I better go throw my biscuits together and chow down!

Tea and Soup

Being pregnant, there's not much I can take in the way of medications for treating a cold or sickness. I just have to tough it out. I've had this cold going on for about a week and I'm just about sick of it, but I have this tea! Pregnancy tea! My momma sent it to me from California, and it's loose so I have to mix it myself but it's easy and soothing to my stuffy head. Plus, it'll help when I go into labor (so I've read) so that's good. Also, it's pretty tasty. You wouldn't think alfalfa would be that yummy, but in combination with red raspberry leaf and peppermint, it's great. Mild, calming and with a touch of honey, it hits the spot.

I've got chicken tortellini soup going on the stove right now. I'm looking forward to it with some biscuits and a family to share it with. Ryan has been working late the past few days so we might just have to chow down before he gets here, but Halie will gladly have a nice dinner and somewhat of a conversation over the dinner table with me. I have laundry to hang too, but the hubby has a bunch of stuff in my laundry area that makes it impossible for me to do so...so it might just go in the dryer, which is fine...it just means more energy down the drain, and we're trying to conserve in every aspect of our lives right now.

Sunday

Today has been a somewhat non-productive day. I made an apple compote for breakfast and did a load of shop towel laundry for hubby but other than that...all my cleaning is done for the week (besides having to sweep hardwood floors everyday) and it's been pretty lazy around here for me and my girl.

The rain is pouring outside so we can't really go out, Ryan is in the shop organizing and cleaning so he's no fun ;) and so we're just kicking back and watching movies. Hopefully next weekend will be a little better weatherwise because we need to paint our midwive's house before the weather gets too bad...and you obviously can't paint in the rain, or if it's too cold.

As of today, I am 27 weeks pregnant. I can't believe in one more week I will be in my third trimester! I have to have an ultrasound because I am measuring a month too big so my midwife is concerned and wants to make sure everything is ok, which I'm sure it is. Ryan is convinced we're having twins because that would be "just his luck" as he says. That would be quite the task! So anyways, when I have my ultrasound in the next few weeks, I know my curiousity will take over and I will want to know what we're having. I want another girl but I could live with a boy too. Girls are just so pretty, clean and sweet. Who could resist? I love doing my girly's hair all up and putting cute girly outfits on her. Well, enough of that for now. I should get back to my movie with Halie bug.

Little Girl

Halie Karissa. My little girl, my little helper, my little friend. At two and half, she has so much to learn, but has already learned so much. I took some photographs of her yesterday to capture the little girl she is becoming and sent them out to everyone and their brother. Her hair is now past her shoulders (though pretty thin still) and her features are becoming more prounounced and grown up by the minute. Her independence has taken off and I can't decide if I appreciate it or fear it because I know the day will sneak up on me when she doesn't need mommy anymore.

We've been potty-training Halie now for a little over a month and I would consider her 'trained' except for nighttime. She's now in big girl underwear during the day, and pull-ups at night because I'm not quite comfortable with her sleeping through the night without an accident...but I'm confident I won't have to worry about diaper changing two kids when the little one is born because of how excited Halie is to use the potty. She always tells me when she has to go and can practically do it all by herself now. Even without a potty seat!

Yesterday we were watching a movie and Halie kept pointing to my tummy and informing me their was a baby inside. Right at that moment, the baby started moving all around so I took Halie's little pudgy hand and told her if she waited a minute, she could feel it. She didn't really understand when it happened that it was the baby, but she felt the movement. I think it's pretty difficult to expect a toddler to understand something they cannot see. She'll understand in a few short months when she's not the only child anymore. I'm a little concerned and scared, but people have been building families forever so I'm sure it's nothing I can't handle. I'm sure Halie will be a wonderful big sister as she is a very nurturing and sensitive little girl who is always looking out for everyone's well-being.

Too Poor, but Always Rich

The past few nights, I've gone to bed crying. Why does life have to be so hard I wonder? Why do we work so hard...just to be broke? How did I end up pregnant with no financial means to deliver this baby? Ooh, I just can't shut my brain up. I think of all the things that have gone wrong in my life or that aren't going to go right no matter how hard I try and it kills me.

On the other hand, I have so many things to be happy about...it's just hard to see the good when your mind is clouded with thoughts of how you're going to put food on the table for one week until payday when all the money is eaten up by bills once again.

I am now working full time at a daycare center that gives me full benefits, paid time off, and a 20% discount on my child care. It truly is a blessing because they pay me more than any other daycare would pay because it's run through a hospital. I get normal working hours so I can be home with my family in the evenings, and I work with two wonderful women.

We live in a beautiful place and it's so peaceful. My husband is always there for me, I have a baby that I feel move inside of me everyday, and the sweetest little girl. I have a clean house, I can cook and I have good friends. So why does money matter? I don't know...it makes the stinking world go around and I keep getting stuck on it's evil carousal ride that spins me so fast I can't seem to catch all my barrings. They say hard work pays off...I know it will...so until then, I will pursue happiness in other areas of my life and try not to break myself worrying about my bills.

Something Different

OK, most of my posts (all 3 of them ha ha) have been about my pregnancy. Well...I was informed by my dad that not everyone likes reading about that all the time. In fact, after we got talking, he started telling me about how my mom used to have groups of women over to watch birth videos (while she was pregnant of course) and how they would all start crying and talking about childbirth being such a beautiful thing. So I guess I can see how after dealing with that three times, he could be burnt out. I will try and write about something different, although I don't have much of a brain right now. Oh how it cracks me up to think about my dad being exposed to a bunch of over emotional, pregnant women watching movies of childbirth. Enough of that.

How about mice? Well, we kill them around here because they are NASTY!!! Recently mouse traps stopped working so we got some poison and put it where no animals or rug rats could get to it. I think it has worked! I haven't found any mouse poop on my counters in about a week! Hallelujah! I went outside for a minute though, and found my dog playing with a dead RAT. Yes, rat. Something I thought we didn't have around here because in two years, we've never seen one or seen the leavings of one. How gross! I hope those things don't find their way into our home.

I'm so original...who ever thought I could write about a dead rat? :)

Fetoscope

My sissy in law let me borrow her fetoscope so I could start listening to the baby's heart beating. I was VERY excited...and...so was Halie. She couldn't wait to try it on herself and listen to her baby's heartbeat either! Fetoscope is not at all like a doppler...Not invasive at all. Midwives start using them at around 19 weeks and I of course thought it would work sooner for me but it didn't because...I'm no exception to the rule. I am 20 weeks now and I think I can hear something if it's really quiet in the room...which isn't often around here!

Here is me at 20 weeks pregnant! Not much change from last time, but I can definitely feel my little one moving around in there now! It's SO exciting :) I think I almost look smaller haha...must be the angle because I'm not shrinking any!